When Janel and I sat down to talk about our wedding, one thing repeatedly surfaced: we did not want our wedding to look like the movies. Janel didn't want a big dress, we didn't want it in a church, and we didn't want an expensive reception with a bouquet toss.
We spoke to each other about being a 'united front' against any forces that would want to change that idea. We were determined to fight the wedding industry when it came after our core ideas and mutated them into some crazy scheme. There were days I hesitated to use the word 'wedding' because of the images it manifests in people's heads.
The thing is... that strategy worked really well. It worked so well that we confused people. Family and friends didn't really know what to think. People asked me what to wear. People asked us if we were married secretly and this was just a way to tell everyone.
After the first few weeks of planning, when we worked to discourage traditional images of weddings from people's minds, we set out to convince everyone that we were are doing is the same thing as a normal wedding, it just looks different.
We're still doing a ceremony- it's just at the courthouse with a few people, no bridal party, no procession, and it will undoubtedly be short. But frankly, most weddings are only 15 minutes when you think about it. And its on a Friday, but that's because the courthouse isn't open on Saturdays and we wanted to do a brunch reception.
The brunch reception is also like a regular reception- except that its in the morning, there is not a dance floor, there will be no bouquet toss or head table, and while we'll have mimosas, the bar will not be open for people to go crazy. However, we will have a meal with our families who could make it. We'll have a guestbook and a photo album. We've got a slideshow with a trivia game on it for people to enjoy. And there are cupcakes. We'll even give a toast.
The afternoon looks much different for our friends, but that's because we never see them and wanted to have fun. We'll play a game for everyone to get to know one another, a sort of bachelor/bachelorette party activity that gets the members of our 'bridal party' having some fun. And then we'll feed them and have a toast and some wine and cupcakes. Don't forget the cupcakes.
As we've visualized more about our wedding celebration, we've realized it's the same, but different. We envisioned it a little differently that what we've all come to know about weddings, but its the same event. One of our friends recently visited and said 'I feel like you're having a party for me, not the other way around.' Neither Janel nor I said anything, but in my head I thought, 'that's exactly right.' We ARE having a party for everyone and we want everyone to have a good time without the pressure of buying bridal dresses or renting tuxes or worrying about the color scheme or purchasing gifts.
Our wedding is about the people who we love and care about and to celebrate a momentous occasion in our lives. We're getting married and its so exciting!
Thursday, July 10, 2014
Saturday, June 21, 2014
Wedpics
This particular post might sound a bit like a "sponsored post", but since this blog gets about 10 hits, at most, I don't think that will EVER happen.
In any case, David and I found a pretty neat website called Wedpics that we'd love for you all to use to help us collect photos from our various events. Please don't feel obligated to use this site, but since we won't have an official photographer, we'd love to be able to collect all of the photos all of you take throughout the day to add to our albums. Plus, everyone's photos will be accessible to everyone else, so this could be an easy way for you to share photos from the day with other family and friends! Wedpics does require you to create an account, but it's free and they don't deluge you with obnoxious emails.
If you're interested, here's how you go about getting access to our Wedpics page via a computer:
1- Go to the Wedpics website.
2- Near the center of the page, find "Join a wedding".
3- Type our wedding ID (VanDeusmeister) into the box and click "Join wedding".
4- Create an account by either connecting through Facebook or registering via e-mail.
5- Once you're registered and logged in, start uploading photos!
And if you'd like to have the app on your smartphone (which would allow you to upload pictures directly from your phone):
1- Go to your phone's app store.
2- Search for "Wedpics" and download the app.
3- Near the center of the page, find "Join a wedding".
4- Type our wedding ID (VanDeusmeister) into the box and click "Join wedding".
5- Create an account by either connecting through Facebook or registering via e-mail.
6- Once you're registered and logged in, start uploading photos!
We can't wait to see the great photos that come out of this!
In any case, David and I found a pretty neat website called Wedpics that we'd love for you all to use to help us collect photos from our various events. Please don't feel obligated to use this site, but since we won't have an official photographer, we'd love to be able to collect all of the photos all of you take throughout the day to add to our albums. Plus, everyone's photos will be accessible to everyone else, so this could be an easy way for you to share photos from the day with other family and friends! Wedpics does require you to create an account, but it's free and they don't deluge you with obnoxious emails.
If you're interested, here's how you go about getting access to our Wedpics page via a computer:
1- Go to the Wedpics website.
2- Near the center of the page, find "Join a wedding".
3- Type our wedding ID (VanDeusmeister) into the box and click "Join wedding".
4- Create an account by either connecting through Facebook or registering via e-mail.
5- Once you're registered and logged in, start uploading photos!
And if you'd like to have the app on your smartphone (which would allow you to upload pictures directly from your phone):
1- Go to your phone's app store.
2- Search for "Wedpics" and download the app.
3- Near the center of the page, find "Join a wedding".
4- Type our wedding ID (VanDeusmeister) into the box and click "Join wedding".
5- Create an account by either connecting through Facebook or registering via e-mail.
6- Once you're registered and logged in, start uploading photos!
We can't wait to see the great photos that come out of this!
Thursday, June 19, 2014
A rambling (wo)man...
I think this is my first blog post. Ever. Of the two of us, David is better at using his words to describe things and working out his thoughts so I usually leave the word-smithing to him. Even so, here I am.
I've had this week off of work. Don't get too jealous-- it's a result of having work an insane week last week while we welcomed the new corps members to Detroit. Since we're about a month out from the wedding (EEP!) I've used this precious time off to get caught up on quite a few wedding tasks. It's really funny how much stuff goes into a wedding, even with something small and a little non-traditional. It's even funnier how there are times that I've spent hours looking at inspiration boards, creating and looking at spreadsheets, and drafting things and yet, after all those hours of "work", I still can't cross anything off the list. On top of that, I feel like every time I cross something off the list, something else hops on it. Like filling out an application for and picking up our marriage license. Yeah, we forgot to add that to the master to-do list until today. Whoops.
Speaking of the master to-do list.... David and I made this beast of a list about 2 weeks ago after getting really overwhelmed by ALL OF THE THINGS that had yet to get done. If you know me at all you know I'm a bit OCD and am a list-maker by nature (as is David), so this shouldn't come as a surprise. What was surprising though, is when I finished tallying all those tasks, they added up to 115! Some of them were little tasks-- "call to book nail salon"-- but others, like "write ceremony" were...a bit more massive. YIKES! On the one hand, in wedding terms, it's my understanding that 115 things to do in 6 weeks doesn't seem like that much. But still, 115 things left to do. Whew.
So here we are, 2 weeks after the creation of the list and we're down to 77 tasks. 77 little (or not so little-- we still haven't written our ceremony) things to do and 35 days standing between us and our wedding. Part of me wants to just get those 77 things done right now, but I know that's not possible, nor will it make our wedding day come any sooner. Another part of me-- the more practical, rational part-- realizes that all this planning isn't just about crossing things off a list. It's about making sure we've thought through all of the parts of our wedding weekend to ensure all these people we love and are celebrating with us have a chance to do just that-- love us and celebrate with us in a way that fits us and our "vibe" and style.
Now, pardon me while I go attack a few more items on this list before the weekend.
I've had this week off of work. Don't get too jealous-- it's a result of having work an insane week last week while we welcomed the new corps members to Detroit. Since we're about a month out from the wedding (EEP!) I've used this precious time off to get caught up on quite a few wedding tasks. It's really funny how much stuff goes into a wedding, even with something small and a little non-traditional. It's even funnier how there are times that I've spent hours looking at inspiration boards, creating and looking at spreadsheets, and drafting things and yet, after all those hours of "work", I still can't cross anything off the list. On top of that, I feel like every time I cross something off the list, something else hops on it. Like filling out an application for and picking up our marriage license. Yeah, we forgot to add that to the master to-do list until today. Whoops.
Speaking of the master to-do list.... David and I made this beast of a list about 2 weeks ago after getting really overwhelmed by ALL OF THE THINGS that had yet to get done. If you know me at all you know I'm a bit OCD and am a list-maker by nature (as is David), so this shouldn't come as a surprise. What was surprising though, is when I finished tallying all those tasks, they added up to 115! Some of them were little tasks-- "call to book nail salon"-- but others, like "write ceremony" were...a bit more massive. YIKES! On the one hand, in wedding terms, it's my understanding that 115 things to do in 6 weeks doesn't seem like that much. But still, 115 things left to do. Whew.
So here we are, 2 weeks after the creation of the list and we're down to 77 tasks. 77 little (or not so little-- we still haven't written our ceremony) things to do and 35 days standing between us and our wedding. Part of me wants to just get those 77 things done right now, but I know that's not possible, nor will it make our wedding day come any sooner. Another part of me-- the more practical, rational part-- realizes that all this planning isn't just about crossing things off a list. It's about making sure we've thought through all of the parts of our wedding weekend to ensure all these people we love and are celebrating with us have a chance to do just that-- love us and celebrate with us in a way that fits us and our "vibe" and style.
Now, pardon me while I go attack a few more items on this list before the weekend.
Friday, June 13, 2014
Once More, With Feeling
It's hard to plan a wedding when you're doing a wedding and a reception, but you're not doing a wedding and reception. I find myself hesitating when restaurants ask what type of event I'm doing, mostly because when I saw a wedding reception, I clarify by telling everyone that we aren't doing dancing and table settings and things you might think of with a reception. Maybe I should tell them we're doing a rehearsal dinner?
When you say the word 'wedding' lots of things pop into my mind. Oddly enough, the first thing I see is a giant white gown and brilliant teeth from people smiling and posing in photos. I see dances and clinking glasses and people dressed up for celebration. Yet this isn't really what Janel and I wanted for our wedding. We didn't want to end the night having seen everyone in our life for 10 seconds each and waking up the next morning exhausted wondering who we saw and who we didn't.
When we started to plan our wedding we focused on one thing: the feeling. What did we want our wedding to feel like? We spent some time thinking up words to describe what we wanted the wedding to be like. Relaxed and comfortable, fun, enjoyable, jovial: these were all words we thought about and feelings we wanted to invoke. It is no coincidence that we aimed for something simple with our wedding celebration because we don't want people to be stressed or uncomfortable, we want things to be fun.
Coming up with words for the feel of a wedding are pretty easy when compared to figuring out what those feelings look like. Janel and I hope we have done that. But at the end of the day, we don't care so much about the flowers and the decorations and a theme for our wedding, but more about what everything feels like. Our family should be relaxed, our friends should be relaxed, and we should be relaxed. And happy. That's important. Oh, and married.
Wednesday, June 11, 2014
Engagement Story
If you don't know about the engagement story or just want to relive the thrilling tale, you can read more about it here.
The same story can also be found on the About Us Page.
The same story can also be found on the About Us Page.
A Simple Wedding
When Janel and I started discussing our wedding, we had one thing in mind: it was not going to be a 'traditional' wedding. We didn't want hundreds of guests. We didn't want to be married in a church. We didn't want the bouquet toss and the head table and the hundreds and hundreds of photographs. None of these things are bad or wrong or the incorrect thing to do, we just didn't and don't want to do them.
Instead we decided we would do something simple. Something easy and uncomplicated. Something that didn't take very much to put together. We thought of it as a party for our family and friends that we would host, doing things we want to do and celebrating what we want to celebrate. We have utilized the blog and companion book 'A Practical Wedding' to hone in on the things we want.
Remarkably this has been difficult. And perhaps even more astounding to me are the number of choices that come with such a 'simple' wedding. Remember, we don't have a church booked, we don't have a reception hall, we don't need a DJ, we don't need to sample foods, we don't need to decide chair covers, and we don't need to think about seating charts. And yet, we have made tons of decisions and have over 100 things to do before the big day.
Two weekends ago Janel and I drove to a friends' wedding in New Jersey, just outside Philadelphia. The wedding was gorgeous, we had a wonderful time, and we danced the night away. In our 10 hour car ride home, we had a chance to reflect and think about our own wedding. It was during this car ride that I confessed to Janel that I felt that our way of doing a wedding might actually be harder to do than a traditional wedding. There is no guidebook to follow. There are thousands of places for inspiration, and you can bet that we are copying and stealing ideas from all kinds of sources, but there isn't really a checklist to go through. When the wedding you envision is a bit different from what is pumped out today, it becomes very hard to figure out how to do what you want.
What I told Janel then and what I'll tell you now is that I think at the end of the day, the work we're putting into it will make it worth it in the end. There have been countless times where I've had to reiterate to people the plan we have for our wedding weekend. People are confused and unsure because there aren't the usual clues for how to react and interact at a wedding. We don't even have a gift registry. After each conversation I have to stop and think about why we decided to do it the way we are. I always remind myself of what I told Janel: as long as the people we love are there, the rest of it doesn't really matter.
I certainly hope everyone has a good time. We're working hard on things that might not be at a typical wedding and frankly, they might be a bit weird and silly in execution. But honestly, Janel and I are a little weird and silly. Does this capture our entire relationship? Of course not. Does it inject our personality into a formal occasion? Absolutely. Even if what we end up doing doesn't go exactly how we envision, the camaraderie of family and friends will carry through the day. When the dust clears, three things should have happened: 1) I want to be married to Janel; 2) I want to have spent adequate and quality time with members of my family and friends; 3) I want people to leave with a smile on their face and warm feelings in their heart.
If that happens, its a success. And through all the choices, I always remember that this is what really counts.
Instead we decided we would do something simple. Something easy and uncomplicated. Something that didn't take very much to put together. We thought of it as a party for our family and friends that we would host, doing things we want to do and celebrating what we want to celebrate. We have utilized the blog and companion book 'A Practical Wedding' to hone in on the things we want.
Remarkably this has been difficult. And perhaps even more astounding to me are the number of choices that come with such a 'simple' wedding. Remember, we don't have a church booked, we don't have a reception hall, we don't need a DJ, we don't need to sample foods, we don't need to decide chair covers, and we don't need to think about seating charts. And yet, we have made tons of decisions and have over 100 things to do before the big day.
Two weekends ago Janel and I drove to a friends' wedding in New Jersey, just outside Philadelphia. The wedding was gorgeous, we had a wonderful time, and we danced the night away. In our 10 hour car ride home, we had a chance to reflect and think about our own wedding. It was during this car ride that I confessed to Janel that I felt that our way of doing a wedding might actually be harder to do than a traditional wedding. There is no guidebook to follow. There are thousands of places for inspiration, and you can bet that we are copying and stealing ideas from all kinds of sources, but there isn't really a checklist to go through. When the wedding you envision is a bit different from what is pumped out today, it becomes very hard to figure out how to do what you want.
What I told Janel then and what I'll tell you now is that I think at the end of the day, the work we're putting into it will make it worth it in the end. There have been countless times where I've had to reiterate to people the plan we have for our wedding weekend. People are confused and unsure because there aren't the usual clues for how to react and interact at a wedding. We don't even have a gift registry. After each conversation I have to stop and think about why we decided to do it the way we are. I always remind myself of what I told Janel: as long as the people we love are there, the rest of it doesn't really matter.
I certainly hope everyone has a good time. We're working hard on things that might not be at a typical wedding and frankly, they might be a bit weird and silly in execution. But honestly, Janel and I are a little weird and silly. Does this capture our entire relationship? Of course not. Does it inject our personality into a formal occasion? Absolutely. Even if what we end up doing doesn't go exactly how we envision, the camaraderie of family and friends will carry through the day. When the dust clears, three things should have happened: 1) I want to be married to Janel; 2) I want to have spent adequate and quality time with members of my family and friends; 3) I want people to leave with a smile on their face and warm feelings in their heart.
If that happens, its a success. And through all the choices, I always remember that this is what really counts.
Wednesday, May 28, 2014
The Wedding Schedule
Janel and I are planners. Seriously, we have calendars all over the place. We even have multiple Google Calenders... just so we can keep our calendars up to date.
We've been talking about a wedding for some time. Not lots of details, but just getting married and what that might be like. With the engagement out of the way, we now have to plan our wedding. And when it came to it, we didn't want to do the 'traditional' wedding.
A few notes about this:
1). We aren't doing something different to simply do something different. Try as we might, we just aren't hipsters.
2). There is NOTHING wrong with doing things in the 'traditional' way. It just isn't something we want to do. We don't want to spend the money, we aren't 'spotlight' people, we don't want to exchange vows in front of lots of people, and we don't want to have a whirlwind of a reception.
3). We are making no statements. This isn't to shun the wedding industry or anything, we just wanted to do something that fit us.
The result is the schedule we have figured out for our wedding weekend. We hope to see you there!
Friday, July 25
Private Wedding Ceremony
Parents and siblings at the Kalamazoo Court House
As stated above, we don't like being in the spotlight. A short and sweet ceremony with private vows in front of our immediate families is enough for us. We'll celebrate with some dinner and call it a wedding!
Saturday, July 26
Brunch at FoodDance 10 AM
Family
All grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and distant relatives are invited to attend! Basically, we wanted brunch at FoodDance and the space had some constraints. On top of it all, we have some time to meet up with our grandparents and family members who are able to come. We can chat with them, laugh with them, talk with them about fun things and hopefully have people mingling with one another while enjoying a delicious breakfast and CUPCAKES! YESSSS!
Amazing Race 3PM
Friends
The ONE show that Janel and I watch on live TV is the Amazing Race. One day you will see us on it (or at least be able to watch our audition tapes). We thought about a scavenger hunt from the onset because we both love to do them (we have already competed in the Hillsdale County Treasure Hunt) and want to put one on for our friends. Rather than sitting around trying to talk to everyone, we're going to send everyone on a footrace around Kalamazoo, searching for and solving clues Amazing Race style that are mostly about their two friends who have tied the knot. There may be some challenges and some puzzles, but there will mostly be fun.
Dinner 6 PM
Friends
After we race our friends around town, we'll have some time to clean up and then head out to dinner. We want some tasty food and some drinks to celebrate with our friends, most of whom have made some kind of lengthly journey to see us.
After-Dinner Drinks
For those who can stay, we're going out on the town. We want to celebrate Kalamazoo style, which means Bells and beers from around downtown while sharing laughs and crazy antics. Its a great way to end the night.
We hope you're excited because we can't wait to see you there!
We've been talking about a wedding for some time. Not lots of details, but just getting married and what that might be like. With the engagement out of the way, we now have to plan our wedding. And when it came to it, we didn't want to do the 'traditional' wedding.
A few notes about this:
1). We aren't doing something different to simply do something different. Try as we might, we just aren't hipsters.
2). There is NOTHING wrong with doing things in the 'traditional' way. It just isn't something we want to do. We don't want to spend the money, we aren't 'spotlight' people, we don't want to exchange vows in front of lots of people, and we don't want to have a whirlwind of a reception.
3). We are making no statements. This isn't to shun the wedding industry or anything, we just wanted to do something that fit us.
The result is the schedule we have figured out for our wedding weekend. We hope to see you there!
Friday, July 25
Private Wedding Ceremony
Parents and siblings at the Kalamazoo Court House
As stated above, we don't like being in the spotlight. A short and sweet ceremony with private vows in front of our immediate families is enough for us. We'll celebrate with some dinner and call it a wedding!
Saturday, July 26
Brunch at FoodDance 10 AM
Family
All grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and distant relatives are invited to attend! Basically, we wanted brunch at FoodDance and the space had some constraints. On top of it all, we have some time to meet up with our grandparents and family members who are able to come. We can chat with them, laugh with them, talk with them about fun things and hopefully have people mingling with one another while enjoying a delicious breakfast and CUPCAKES! YESSSS!
Amazing Race 3PM
Friends
The ONE show that Janel and I watch on live TV is the Amazing Race. One day you will see us on it (or at least be able to watch our audition tapes). We thought about a scavenger hunt from the onset because we both love to do them (we have already competed in the Hillsdale County Treasure Hunt) and want to put one on for our friends. Rather than sitting around trying to talk to everyone, we're going to send everyone on a footrace around Kalamazoo, searching for and solving clues Amazing Race style that are mostly about their two friends who have tied the knot. There may be some challenges and some puzzles, but there will mostly be fun.
Dinner 6 PM
Friends
After we race our friends around town, we'll have some time to clean up and then head out to dinner. We want some tasty food and some drinks to celebrate with our friends, most of whom have made some kind of lengthly journey to see us.
After-Dinner Drinks
For those who can stay, we're going out on the town. We want to celebrate Kalamazoo style, which means Bells and beers from around downtown while sharing laughs and crazy antics. Its a great way to end the night.
We hope you're excited because we can't wait to see you there!
Thursday, May 1, 2014
Wedding Day
Get ready its going to be great!
Janel and I are planning on doing a private ceremony on July 25 and then celebrating with all the people we love on July 26 in Kalamazoo!
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| Downtown Kalamazoooo! |
The morning is going to be filled with family time, entertaining our parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and that random guy who says he's our uncle but neither of us know who he is.
The afternoon we're kickin' it with our friends who are coming from all corners of the country (and some from other countries) as we enjoy a day of food, fun, and beer!
If you need a hotel, check out the Radisson in downtown Kalamazoo. We have a block of rooms at a discounted rate. If you're a Bronco Alum, just let the staff know and you can get the same rate if you need multiple nights.
The New Adventure!
It's true! Janel and David are engaged!
We started this blog because we are soooo anti-Millenial and aren't on Facebook. What better way to stay in touch with the people who care about us than by blogging about our adventures, thoughts, and struggles in life. We hope you enjoy!
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