The Wedding

We were engaged on April 5, 2014 and signed our marriage license on July 25, 2014. In the 3 or 4 months of our engagement, we planned, developed, and threw a really cool party with friends and family, officially tied the knot, accomplished it on a respectable budget, and achieved the wedding that we imagined. It was unconventional. It was a bit quirky. It isn't for everyone. But we have memories for life. This page chronicles that achievement.

The concept for our wedding took some thinking. We spent several nights sitting in the living room discussing what the look and feel of our wedding should be. Ultimately, we focused more on how we wanted it to feel than what it looked like and what happened during the event. We focused on who we wanted to be there and what we wanted them to experience.

The main word that we found emerging was 'fun.' We wanted people to be relaxed, to have a good time, to be able to talk to us and to talk to old friends that they were destined to see. We wanted family to have a chance to learn about our relationship and most of all, we wanted it to be stress free. While stress always has a way of sneaking into days like this, I think we accomplished most of these goals.

For the wedding itself, we chose to get married on Friday because that is the one day that the Kalamazoo Courthouse does marriage ceremonies. Neither of us is particularly religious, neither of our parents demanded a church wedding, and we both felt that a quick ceremony in front of a justice of the peace was a great way to do it.

We also knew that we wanted it to be in front of immediate family members and no one else. We are by nature somewhat private people and we wanted this to be an intimate experience. Additionally, we were doing brunch no matter what, and to ask people to come for two days was just too much.

After our ceremony we had a small dinner with family at a local restaurant. We celebrated with wine and champagne and dessert and all came back to the hotel to play a hand of cards before getting ready for day two. Yes, we played cards with our family on our wedding night.


Day two was our reception and what was nice about the two day extravaganza was that we were well-rested for the family reception. It wasn't super early and the crowd wasn't huge so we had plenty of time to welcome guests, say hello to all who came, and give people a chance to mingle. For some, it may have just felt like a brunch. For us, this was exactly what we wanted. It was a wedding reception, but it wasn't big. It was very 'us', and to celebrate a union of two people, what else could you ask for?

After our family cleared out of town, we zipped over to Bronson Park and prepared our scavenger hunt for our friends: David and Janel's Amazing Race. In hindsight, we might not have had our friends arrive and then send them off immediately on a race, but in hindsight, I think it worked wonderfully. Our friends were clearly nervous and unsure about what we were doing, but I think they had fun. We certainly had fun putting the race together and frankly, that is more important to me than the quality of the hunt.

The Clue Holders

The Winning Team

It ended at the local watering hole and we had plenty of fun stories to share as each team experienced some very odd stories and competitive spirits were high. Over beers we were able to say hello to friends that we hadn't seen in some time and bask in the elation of seeing so many friends gathered in one place. Again, this is EXACTLY what we were hoping for.

We sent everyone to the hotels to change and had everyone meet us for dinner at the Wine Loft where the wine was flowing and the stories were flying. We stayed for several hours, gossiping and laughing and eating dozens of cupcakes. Some friends needed to get going for early flights or travel plans while others were with us for after-hours activities.

When the weekend was over and our friends left, Janel and I slept for several hours. Yet the grins from our faces didn't fade for days. We were exhausted and had limited time to enjoy a honeymoon, but we made memories that will last. When we reflect on the wedding weekend that we put together, it came out exactly as we hoped. Some details were different than what we planned and some things worked better than others. When we sought a feeling instead of a look, we removed much of the stress over tiny details that aren't memorable. Instead, we have many feelings that will stick with us. The joy and elation of having so many people together who love and support you is what a wedding is all about.

I've said it many times: this wedding is not for everyone. This wedding is for us. I think we accomplished what we set out to accomplish and created an event that was enjoyable for everyone, but fit our personalities and the symbolism that our marriage represents. It was a perfect start to what we anticipate will be a long and happy marriage. If you were there, thank you for being a part of it. If you're seeking ideas for your own wedding just remember to stay true to yourselves and pursue the feeling that you want. If that is there on your wedding day, everything else is just details.