It's hard to plan a wedding when you're doing a wedding and a reception, but you're not doing a wedding and reception. I find myself hesitating when restaurants ask what type of event I'm doing, mostly because when I saw a wedding reception, I clarify by telling everyone that we aren't doing dancing and table settings and things you might think of with a reception. Maybe I should tell them we're doing a rehearsal dinner?
When you say the word 'wedding' lots of things pop into my mind. Oddly enough, the first thing I see is a giant white gown and brilliant teeth from people smiling and posing in photos. I see dances and clinking glasses and people dressed up for celebration. Yet this isn't really what Janel and I wanted for our wedding. We didn't want to end the night having seen everyone in our life for 10 seconds each and waking up the next morning exhausted wondering who we saw and who we didn't.
When we started to plan our wedding we focused on one thing: the feeling. What did we want our wedding to feel like? We spent some time thinking up words to describe what we wanted the wedding to be like. Relaxed and comfortable, fun, enjoyable, jovial: these were all words we thought about and feelings we wanted to invoke. It is no coincidence that we aimed for something simple with our wedding celebration because we don't want people to be stressed or uncomfortable, we want things to be fun.
Coming up with words for the feel of a wedding are pretty easy when compared to figuring out what those feelings look like. Janel and I hope we have done that. But at the end of the day, we don't care so much about the flowers and the decorations and a theme for our wedding, but more about what everything feels like. Our family should be relaxed, our friends should be relaxed, and we should be relaxed. And happy. That's important. Oh, and married.
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